Gay-Friendly Is Not a Standard: How Advisors Vet All-Inclusive Resorts for LGBTQ Clients

Imagine getting a call from potential clients stating, “we want an all-inclusive, and we want to feel comfortable,” referring to their LGBTQ relationship. You, as the advisor, are left deciding what being comfortable means, and how you can guide your clients through the process of recommending and selecting a resort that fits the bill. A resort’s website can’t really answer that question, and that gap between marketing materials and the clients’ questions is where you as a travel advisor earn your commission. Closing that gap takes three steps: testing the “gay-friendly” label, vetting the destination as well as the resort and asking about the kids.

What ‘Gay-Friendly’ Really Means

Gay-friendly is just a marketing claim. It’s unreliable; there’s no universal certification or standards to uphold. It can be a leading indicator of a resort you want to vet further for your clients, but it’s certainly not enough of a basis to book a vacation on by itself.

When an LGBTQ traveler brings you this kind of request, don’t assume they only want an LGBTQ-focused property. Ask which of these three experiences they have in mind:

• Mainstream and welcoming. A resort open to every guest, with no LGBTQ focus, where staff are respectful and the guest mix is broad.
• LGBTQ-focused. A property that is LGBTQ-owned or built around LGBTQ guests, often adults-only.
• Group charter. A week when an LGBTQ travel organization takes over much of a resort, usually a mainstream one, with hosted events and a built-in community.

Each suits a different client. Your job is to match the traveler to the right one, not to default to any of them.

Vet the Destination, Not Just the Resort

There are many beautiful all-inclusive resorts around the world, and many advertise themselves as being gay-friendly or gay-welcoming; however, many countries still have laws on the books that are hostile to LGBTQ people, and dozens still include possible jail time just for being LGBTQ.

Welcoming properties can sit in countries where hostile laws or social attitudes don’t align with that welcome, and the client’s impression starts with landing at the airport, transferring to the resort, excursions and nightlife. Imagine going on a vacation with your loved one and not being able to kiss them or hold their hand in public without risking public humiliation, fines or even jail time. Your work as a travel advisor is critical not only for their enjoyment, but also for your client’s health and safety.

Many LGBTQ travelers pay attention and “vote with their wallets” and make significant steps to only support countries that are supportive of their identity. Simply calling a resort and asking a few questions is not enough. You need to start with the destination itself, and only then spend your valuable time as the travel advisor interviewing resorts that may fit the clients’ request to be “comfortable.”

Laws are always changing, and they can move in either direction. Do your own research, and give your clients access to the same tools, starting with the U.S. State Department’s travel country pages and ILGA World’s database (the International Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Intersex Association).

Once the destination checks out, vetting resorts and tour operators for LGBTQ clients can take on a few different looks, but likely will involve a few phone calls to ask questions like how staff handles same-sex clients at check-in, whether non-discrimination policies are written down for staff to follow and if staff is provided any trainings, as well as doing online research and reading reviews from previous LGBTQ travelers. It also means going beyond one glowing or one horrible review, just as it does with any other research. On the same call, it can be beneficial to ask to talk to the resort’s group sales team about their experience with LGBTQ weddings or other focused LGBTQ groups, as it provides a lot of clarity on how much focus the resort pays to LGBTQ travelers in general.

Doing this legwork as the advisor gives your clients a lot of trust and saves them hours of research themselves, but it’s important to communicate to your clients what steps you have already taken to help vet the resort on their behalf and why you feel it’s the best fit for their upcoming travel, along with any less than favorable information before you collect a deposit. Doing so adds so much value to your LGBTQ clients, but also strengthens your processes for all clients, LGBTQ or otherwise.

Don’t Overlook LGBTQ Families

Most LGBTQ travel content and advertising involves couples or groups of friends. Same-sex parents face an entirely different set of questions and concerns that any travel advisor who wants to earn LGBTQ travelers’ business should also understand. Number one is not assuming that they don’t have children or family that will be accompanying them.

As you build your knowledge of your clients and prepare to call the resorts after doing your destination research, asking questions about kids’ clubs and staff’s attitudes and trainings towards LGBTQ families, how other families at the resort tend to respond to LGBTQ families and how the destination surroundings generally react to LGBTQ families all help you make the best recommendations for your clients.

Update Your Advisor Checklist

Maybe now is the time to go beyond the normal client intake questions, expand your advisor checklist and include questions focused on LGBTQ travel. It can even include some very low-pressure types of questions that state something to the effect of, “Is there anything about the destination or atmosphere that would make this trip better or worse for you?” Let the clients do the talking; they’ll tell you what you want to know when given the opportunity.

“LGBTQ” also covers travelers whose concerns go beyond who they travel with. Transgender and nonbinary clients can face a booking name or gender marker that doesn’t match their travel documents, gendered spa and locker-room facilities and security screening, so ask about these at booking, not at check-in.

For the client:

• How much time do you expect to spend on the resort versus off it, in excursions, transfers and nightlife?

• Are you picturing a mainstream resort, an LGBTQ-focused one or a group charter week?
• Who is traveling, including children?
• Is there anything from a past trip that you want me to avoid repeating?
• Is there anything about your travel documents, gendered facilities such as spas or security screening that I should plan around?

For the resort:

• Is there a written non-discrimination policy, and does it name sexual orientation and gender identity?
• What training do front desk, housekeeping and activities staff receive?
• How do you handle a same-sex couple booking one room, including bed type?
• Have you hosted same-sex weddings or LGBTQ groups, and can I speak with group sales?
• For families: how does the kids’ club handle children with two moms or two dads?
• Are spa and locker-room facilities gender-specific, and how do you accommodate guests who need other arrangements?

The Bottom Line

Before your next LGBTQ client calls, do three things:

1. Add a few LGBTQ-specific questions to your intake checklist.
2. Research the destination before you call a single resort.
3. Ask every client, families included, what would make the trip better or worse for them.

The same habit applies well beyond LGBTQ travel. Look at who else your intake process underserves, such as travelers with disabilities or food allergies, and build the questions they need. Advisors who do this earn clients for life and a steady stream of referrals.

A gay-friendly label tells a client what a resort wants to be called. Your vetting tells them what it is actually like to stay there, and no booking site can offer that.